Christian, do you ever admire the lost? Are you ever envious or jealous of them? I am. Let me explain why. The other day at work, while working alone, I listened to two other employees nearby talking while they were working together. They were talking up a storm about their favourite things, the things that interest them the most, and they were doing so with passion. When a topic interests you, why would you not talk about it with passion?
People often wonder why I do not have a lot to say and generally keep to myself. Because of this, they presume that I am arrogant and standoffish. Generally, I do not have much to say because I have nothing to contribute to the conversation as I do not know much, if anything, about the things that interest them. However, when they have things to say, I will listen to them and every now and then chime in and say or ask something, whether to clarify what they have just said or to get a better understanding of what they are trying to say. For instance, if a car guy is talking to me about cars, I know absolutely nothing about cars as I have no interest in them (apart from driving them from point A to point B). When they are finished with what they have to say, it generally becomes quiet as I have nothing to say and cannot talk about what I am passionate about.
The alternate reason as to why I do not have much to say is because I have absolutely no interest in their immediate conversation due to it being centered on filth, which I refuse to glorify in the least. When they are talking about drinking and drugs and parties and getting laid, I could care less. Those are conversations I do not wish to take part in, and I usually let them know.
I admire the lost and am envious and jealous of them because they can freely talk with passion about whatever interests they have, regardless of how mundane. If I were to start talking about what I am passionate about, they would accuse me of "preaching" to them and I would soon be dismissed from my job. It is pretty sad, too, because when I was in high school, you could dialogue with an unbeliever and reason with them without them getting angry or accusing you of trying to shove religion down their throat. They were more open back then, more reasonable, and you could talk freely about religion, having a decent discussion, without arguing. Nowadays, however, you even mention the word "religion" and people fly off the handle in an irate tirade.
I am passionate about Christ Jesus, the Bible, theology, and real science (the stuff you can hypothesize, test, and observe—not the imaginary fiction purported by evolutionists). When I am around other Christians, I tend to take advantage of it and I just talk and talk and talk. Why? Because I do not get to do so very often. I am starved for rational, logical, intelligent conversation. I would love to talk about my interests, but modern society hates Christ Jesus, hates His truth, and hates those who follow Him. Even just by living differently, they notice and they begin targeting you. I do my best to keep my head down and my nose clean, yet somehow rumours, gossip, and lies seem to find me. I do not appreciate liars who make stuff up about me just to try and get me in trouble because they do not like me. If their biggest accusation against me is that I am a Christian, I would be all too happy to plead guilty.
When I am involved in a conversation pertaining to someone's interests, I do not notice it so much. However, when I am a third-party to their conversation, I really notice how much people talk about those things they have an interest in. Because of how freely they can talk about their likes and interests, and how they can do so with passion, without fear of reprisal, I envy them. I wish I was able to talk more freely about my passion for theology. I miss not having that freedom.